Oh, , you're going to hate me for posting this...

The Boston Globe

   August 21, 2006

   Roxbury MA (AP) - A seven-year-old boy was at the center of a Boston
   courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who
   should have custody of him. The boy has a history of being beaten by
   his Parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in
   keeping with child custody law and regulations requiring that family
   unity be maintained to the degree possible.

   The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him
   more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her. When
   the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy
   cried out that they also beat him.

   After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning
   that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the
   judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who
   should have custody of him. After two recesses to check legal
   references and confer with child welfare officials, the judge granted
   temporary custody to the Boston Red Sox, whom the boy firmly believes
   is not capable of beating anyone.